I have always feared silence. You never know what is there when you hear it. It’s like you were trapped inside a vacuum. No. There’s still noise inside a vacuum. A void would be more appropriate. It’s deafening it makes me crazy.
Suddenly, Mamang’s humming broke the silence. She was comforting Anina.
I did nothing but watch as she stroke Anina’s hair. Anina was still crying, though silently.
Since when did I last heard Mamang sing? Well, she’s humming, but still…
Music is the first word I could link to her before anything else. I believe that she taught us music first before speech. Ever since Mamang lost her sanity, it felt like music was lost in this house as well. And then everything went silent. And then fear devoured me as the years passed by.
Maybe I wasn’t bereft of any emotion. I can still feel pain, deep within me. No. That’s an overstatement. I don’t feel pain anymore, nor anything else. I just recognize the emotions, but stopped feeling them altogether.
“Did you drive Io away?”
“He wants to get rid of you.”
“You should be the one who left, not Io.”
I was startled.
“You are not my child.”
“I am your child, your second child. Your first daughter, twin sister of your firstborn, Yuen. I am Hinaru, your second child.”
“You are not. I do not know you.”